Problem solving- whether to do it when emotional.

Solving problems can be a really adaptive way to cope in times of stress.  Identifying issues as they arise and having the ability to efficiently work out the steps required to manage the issues and effectively carry them is a human mastery skill for sure!  My stoic and beautiful late aunt famously said “don’t get upset, get organised” in the face of adversity.  But if problems trigger emotion in you those feeling also need to be addressed alon with the problems that triggered it.   In moments of emotional overwhelm there’s no shame in resting, chilling and not doing.  Sometimes it is more productive and skilful to leave the problem solving for a later date once you have made space for any emotional experience and it has naturally passed.  

Solving problems can be a really adaptive way to cope in times of stress.  Identifying issues as they arise and having the ability to efficiently work out the steps required to manage the issues and effectively carry them out is a human mastery skill for sure!  My stoic and beautiful late aunt famously said in the face of adversity “don’t get upset, get organised.”  But if problems trigger emotion in you those feelings also need to be addressed along with the problems that triggered it.   In moments of emotional overwhelm there’s no shame in resting, chilling and not doing.  Sometimes it is more productive and skilful to leave the problem solving for a later date, once you have made space for any emotional experience and it has naturally passed.  

Solving problems can be cognitively taxing and emotionally draining.  This skill requires resilience and vitality.  I’m sure everyone has had those ‘A-game’ days where jobs seem effortless as compared to the ‘B-game’ ones where maybe you achieved nothing because you lacked the energy. Before considering utilising problem solving as a self-care skill first check in with yourself to assess your vitality, energy and physical needs.  Do you have the resilience to dive into problem solving right now or could it wait for another day when you feel more up to it?

Recently I encountered some triggering news and subsequently felt emotional in an unpleasant and heavy way.  I turned to my wellness skills to work out how best to cope.  I made self-care choices where able and importantly took the time to feel my experience and acknowledge it.  I considered utilising problem solving as a skill to move forward.  But in this moment of emotion my physical self was sending me messages to simply just chill and allow the wave of my human experience to be.  It felt heavy, I felt tired and it felt unhealthy to problem solve in that moment.   My being really wanted and needed to sit, settle and take care.  So, instead of starting that to do list and kicking some goals, I lay down on the couch.  I allowed the problems to sit along with myself.  I accepted my physical and emotional experience for what it was without trying to solve or change it. I gave myself permission not to problem solve in good faith that I would do so when things felt differently.  After a little time and sleep I felt resilient enough to solve all the problems the following day.

This experience highlighted to me that: problem solving is not always called for despite being a great human mastery skill; it may be appropriate to leave problems when overwhelmed; resilience returns if the body is nurtured (and that this doesn’t take much time); and the bodies’ sensations are your guide.  

Please see your GP if you experience a prolonged period of emotional overwhelm despite time and rest.  Sometimes we need support to solve our problems and that’s ok too.

Solving problems can be cognitively taxing and emotionally draining.  This skill requires resilience and vitality.  I’m sure everyone has had those ‘A-game’ days where jobs seem effortless as compared to the ‘B-game’ ones where maybe you achieved nothing because you lacked the energy. Before considering problem solving as a self-care skill to utilise check in with yourself to and assess your vitality, energy and physical needs.  Do you have the resilience to dive into problem solving right now or could it wait for another day when you feel more up to it?

Recently I encountered some triggering news and subsequently felt emotional in an unpleasant and heavy way.  I turned to my wellness skills to work out how best to cope.  I made self-care choices where able and importantly took the time to feel my experience and acknowledge it.  I considered utilising problem solving as a skill to move forward.  But in this moment of emotion my physical self was sending me messages to simply just chill and allow the wave of my human experience to be.  It felt heavy, I felt tired and it felt unhealthy to problem solve in that moment.   My being really wanted and needed to sit, settle and take care.  So, instead of starting that to do list and kicking some goals, I lay down on the couch.  I allowed the problems to sit along with myself.  I accepted my physical and emotional experience for what it was without trying to solve or change it. I gave myself permission not to problem solve in good faith that I would do so when things felt differently.  After a little time and sleep I felt resilient enough to solve the problems.

This experience highlighted to me that: problem solving is not always called for despite being a great human mastery skill; it is appropriate to leave problems when overwhelmed; resilience returns if the body is nurtured (and that this doesn’t take much time); and the bodies’ sensations are your guide.  

Please see your GP if you experience a prolonged period of emotional overwhelm despite time and rest.  Sometimes we need support to solve our problems and that’s ok too.

By | 2020-04-30T20:58:32+00:00 April 30th, 2020|